In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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