i can't believe i had my finger in that
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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