my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
there is puke in my bra ... again
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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