wat bout pragnant strippers??
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
