They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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