So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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