I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
It's blow job season.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
