How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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