just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
