Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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