super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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