I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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