If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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