Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
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