I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
