I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
