Soap is not a condiment
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
