love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Randomize
