...so i touched it.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
