Do vagina's smell?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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