He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
