You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
