i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
