Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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