dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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