After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize