hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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