So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
