before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Randomize
