Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
