Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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