I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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