Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
