Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
