Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
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