Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Randomize
