It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
this is an emotional support booty call
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
