Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
