You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
