Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I believe in your delicious
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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