you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
