Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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