as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
