thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize
