What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
