Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Damn victory sex feels great
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
