Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize