I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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