This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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