He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
