Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
