Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize
